Thursday, February 12, 2015

Five Years to Build and 5 Seconds to Crumble

Tears tricked down my face. 
My eyes become waterfalls. 
A seemingly endless supply of defeat stream down my cheeks.
This pain was like no other, no Band-Aid, no Tylenol,
there was not a single remedy in the world for a broken heart.  
Feeling every emotion under the sun, 
I couldn't decide if I was just mad or just sad or just anything really. 
FIVE YEARS. 
Five years worth of break ups and make ups, 
nights spent out and nights spent in. 
We spent all that time building this friendship just for it to all end over your pride and your ego and your stubbornness. 
Every memory we ever made together rushed through my mind at once.
The thought of the end took my breath away. 
As I sat there struggling for air I couldn't believe my best friend would treat me this way, 
talk to me this way, and look at me this way. 
Through my sobs I hung on to every word you fired my way. 
The words "You. Are. Ri-dic-u-lous", bruised like rage fueled blows to the gut. 
You stressed each syllable to ensure I felt every bit of pain. 
Every word was stretched out slow but steady,
 making sure I felt the sword being trusted in my back. 
After reloading your gun with your vexed bullets, 
you finally ran out of ammunition. 
As I lay there nursing my wounds, 
I hear your bullets being fired once more "You Are So Sel-fish! 
You Are Dis-re-spect-ful beyond belief", 
like a broken record it plays in my head on repeat.
As if you hadn't done enough, 
you continue to rub salt into my wounds. 
You don't look at me, but through me. 
You don't speak to me but about me. 
Being in a room with you and not next to you becomes harder than not seeing you at all. 
From non stop chatter to painful silence. 
The silence. 
Oh how it kills me slowly. 
Days turn into weeks. 
Weeks turn into months. 
Months turn into years. 
Years turn into what feels like forever. 
But forever ends with a faint "You Were Right", 
so faint I almost don't hear you. 
As I turn around at my desk, 
I turn and see my best friend turn enemy turn stranger sitting in the desk behind mine. 
Those three words instantly sparked my healing, all the bruises, 
wounds and the scars her knife left, shriveled up and melted away. 
The friendship could never be salvaged from the wreckage. 
But now I had the strength to raise from under the rumble. 

www.outlawmama.com

1 comment:

  1. Great use of repetition, and emotion. The reader can see how you felt, and understand the change that took place. Careful with your spelling. 9

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